


Belonging

by SilentApocalypse



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project, Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Character Study, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-06
Updated: 2016-08-06
Packaged: 2018-07-29 16:43:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7692001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentApocalypse/pseuds/SilentApocalypse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hanamaru thinks she isn't suited to being a school idol due to her plainness and poor stamina. She's not cute like that girl in the magazine is. But she comes to realize that no one is perfect and everyone has something unique to offer.</p><p>Set before and just after Ruby and Hanamaru join Aqours.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Belonging

**Author's Note:**

> Hanamaru is my favorite Aqours girl. Rin is my favorite μ's girl. Naturally, I was thrilled to see Hanamaru looking up to Rin in the anime. I wrote this because I wanted to let her discover Rin's struggles with being girly on her own and give her time to react and process it herself, then relate those struggles to her own and realize just because she thinks she isn't naturally suitable doesn't mean she can't be a school idol.

Hanamaru likes the trio of second years who started the school idol club. They’ll be good for Ruby, she thinks. Chika’s straightforward energy is the kind of encouragement she needs when she’s nervous. You is perceptive and supportive, quickly realizing what the people around her need and having the initiative to always try to make things better. Riko has a good head on her shoulders and seems somewhat shy and nervous about crowds, too. It feels like Ruby belongs with them.

She has always been happy to support her friend’s interest in idols. The way Ruby’s eyes sparkle and her hands gesture wildly when she talks about her favorites makes her smile, and the redhead’s puppy dog eyes have even convinced her to try some dances. Hanamaru thinks she could never be a school idol herself, though. She is ordinary, not cute like the others, meant to be a supporting character cheering the real stars on from the sidelines.

All along, she has thought deep down that Ruby was meant for bigger and better things and she would only slow her down. But it still hurts to stand and just watch as she runs up the stairs without her. It takes all of the meager strength Hanamaru has to turn and walk away.

When she returns home that evening, after telling Ruby to let herself stop worrying so much about others and telling Dia to let her sister follow her dreams, she feels restless. She flops on her bed, but doesn’t touch the book sitting on her desk. Instead, she stares at the ceiling and wonders when she stopped being honest with herself.

They’re not the same, she reasons. Ruby is cute, always has been, and her passion for idols is unrivaled. As long as she has people she can trust to help her when she’s feeling shy, she’s going to succeed as an idol. There’s a magnetic quality to her, Hanamaru thinks, one that makes people want to cheer her on. But Hanamaru is plain and old-fashioned. She has an embarrassing accent and gets wrapped up in books. Her stamina is atrocious and she’s not very cute. Everything she knows about idols is only because she heard it from Ruby. All of that, she tells herself, means she would be a terrible school idol.

Still, she finds herself eventually pulling the magazine about μ‘s from her backpack. Though she pretends to flip through it idly, she ends up staring once again at that page of the girl in a wedding-style outfit. Her name is on the page in big letters, Rin Hoshizora (she knows she’s heard Ruby mention it before). She’s pretty, sure, but every girl in their group is. What really keeps drawing Hanamaru back in is how confident she looks.

In that picture Hanamaru thinks this girl must be a natural, growing up cute and having strength and stamina for days and a fierce passion for being an idol. Staring at that page, she convinces herself this girl has been destined to be an idol her whole life. So when she goes to the section that highlights each member of the famous school idol group and looks at Rin’s profile, she freezes.

She doesn’t freeze because she’s exactly like this girl, because she’s not. Rin is athletic and loves sports, while Hanamaru doesn’t have the stamina to keep up with anyone in gym class. But this well-known and obviously beloved school idol apparently didn’t believe she was feminine or pretty enough to be an idol. At first, she thought she was too much of a tomboy and would only embarrass herself in a dress or skirt.

Hanamaru flips back to the photo and reads closely over the attached story. It’s a funny thing about an unexpected storm trapping the second years for a few extra days on a school trip and causing the remaining six members to have to perform for a fashion show on their own. Rin was chosen as the new center. Now that Hanamaru knows a bit more about Rin, she thinks this was probably very difficult for her, but the picture still shows her a girl who is comfortable and confident and positively glowing with happiness.

A hope flutters in her heart that things might be like Chika says, that it’s wanting to be a school idol that lets you be one rather than any natural talent. She tells herself that’s just a fantasy as she closes the magazine and lets it drop to the floor. But she can’t help but wonder, as she tries to sleep that night, if some random girl out there might think even she was cute if they saw a picture of her as a shining school idol.

 

***

 

Though she still doesn’t feel sure she’ll be any good, Hanamaru gives in when Ruby pushes her to join the school idol club. She wants to try and Chika and the others assure her that’s enough. That night, she takes the magazine and carefully tears out the page she can’t stop staring at. It feels like Rin is watching over her from where it’s pinned on the wall as Hanamaru tries to practice choreography in her room.

A few days later the girls start discussing their strong and weak points before they start practice. “I mean as school idols!” Chika pouts when Riko and You begin with her impulsiveness.

“It’s a charm point,” You insists, giggling. Chika’s cheeks puff out and then they’re all laughing, Ruby and Hanamaru included.

“Um, I guess… I really like idols? So I know a lot about them,” Ruby hedges, looking unsure.

“You’re cute,” Hanamaru adds. “And you’ve been imitating idols since you were little, so you’re good at poses and expressions. Oh, and you sew. You’re good with fashion, too.”

“You're exaggerating,” she insists, flushing. “Oh, I know! Hanamaru is really good at singing! She’s been in choirs before and her voice is pretty.”

Now it’s Hanamaru’s turn to look embarrassed as the attention is turned to her. “We haven’t heard the first years sing yet,” Riko realizes. “We were working on dancing and stamina during their trial period, and I haven’t finished writing anything meant for more than three people.”

“Let me hear!” Chika begs, clapping her hands together.

“I really haven’t sang anything but hymns in front of people,” Hanamaru admits.

“Doesn’t matter!” She takes that in stride, just as she seems to with everything. “You heard that song we sang at our first live show, right? We’ve got the lyrics and the instrumental around here somewhere.”

While she’s not nearly as shy as her best friend, Hanamaru feels nervous with everyone’s attention on her. But singing is familiar to her, something she’s been doing since she was a little girl. Riko hands her sheet music and You sets up the song while Chika bounces excitedly on the balls of her feet and Ruby beams at her. Even though pop songs aren’t what she’s used to, she settles in once she starts and almost forgets where she is.

So it’s a surprise when the four of them clap enthusiastically when she’s done. “That was amazing!” Chika says with a grin. You salutes at her. Riko’s eyes are glittering and given she’s their composer it seems like a pretty big compliment. Ruby’s smile is somehow even wider than it was before.

Hanamaru Kunikida still thinks of herself as plain. But in that moment, as she thanks them, she feels like she just might have something to offer as a school idol.


End file.
